Effective listening

COMM 200S ODU

TUTH 11:00AM

Carla Harrell, Ph.D.

Effective listening is an important skill of communication. Many individuals believe that listening solely means, being in earshot of someone talking. When in fact, listening and speaking are both intricate parts of transferring meaning. Researcher Albert Mehrabian produced a formula for communication “He believed fifty-five percent of communication is threw body language, thirty-eight is the tone of voice, and only seven percent is actual words.” (Mehrabian). Therefore, if Merhrabian assessment is accurate over half of communication is in the listeners hands during a conversation. If utilized poorly a discussion can disintegrate rapidly due to poor listening. We are going to discuss several signs displayed by a poor listener. Some may be obvious, others more obscure, but all of them can build a cold feeling of resentment or self-doubt within a speaker.

Bad listening can be seen in quite of few attributes. In this short essay we will discuss how to notice and learn the signs of bad listeners with a character in my life named David. Firstly, David has a problem with remembering conversation topics consequently displaying a sign of disassociation when we talk. This demonstrates a lack of attention in our conversations and is indicative of our text for Remembering but can be argued that it also resembles Being mindful. “This is because a speaker can adopt a feeling of demeaning in the words a speaker has to say.” (Wood, 2011, pp. 116) “Remembering conversation topics can be made easier by processing important information since we can only retain so much at a time.” (Wood, 2011, pp. 120) Personally, enjoying learning something new even if it’s something small and seemingly insignificant helps me remember information more efficiently.

David is also dissident with his physical poster or body language. “When David has an Ambivalent facial expression, wondering eyes, fidgeting uncomfortably, glancing at his watch or phone, even having his body faced toward an exit door, gives the speaker an idea that David feels bored, uninterested, or impatient to leave.” (Wood, 2011, pp. 117) Ordinarily this can happen without David ever being aware of it taking place. He could be a better listener by physically showing his interest by displaying that his attention is focused on what is being said. Smiling, nodding, and making eye contact during a crucial point in a story or explanation allows the speaker to feel heard and understood.

Finally, negative listening can be displayed in the perceived comments follow up after the speaker’s sediment. A few examples with David are “short crass responses, not adding much to the conversation, keeping the dialog about himself, and not asking questions on the subject matter. This delivers the message that the dialogue is not resounding with David or that he is uninterested.” (Wood, 2011, pp. 119) He could better cope with this by asking for clarity, a general example in society, or asking for a personal anecdote. “The book How to Win Friends and Influence People exacerbates the idea of keeping conversation topics about the other person. The author builds the argument throughout the book that people love to talk about themselves and how this keeps them interested.” (Carnegie) “Having good responses can be the bread and butter of a conversation and where its direction ends up heading.” (Wood, 2011, pp. 119)

Work Cited:

Wood, J. (2011). Communication mosaics : an introduction to the field of communication. Boston, MA: Wadsworth Cengage Learning.

Mehrabian, A. (1972). Nonverbal Communication. New Brunswick: Aldine Transaction.

Carnegie, Dale, 1888-1955. (2009). How to win friends and influence people. New York :Simon & Schuster,

MORAL FAMILY COMMUNICATION IMPACTS

COMM 200s ODU

Communicating diverse moral integrity in homes contribute to better family life, nurtures children better suited to have success within institutions, work, and finally have an increasingly satisfied future. Proper communication is a two-way path that requires concentration and respect to properly be executed. Children should respect the knowledge and the dynamics of their parents by actively listening because it is a beneficial moral for them. Furthermore, guardians should demonstrate moral communication and concentrated intelligence in answering maturing adult’s rebuttals and beliefs. Constructive character criticism is a powerful force that helps develop adolescence.

The household seldom appears to cultivate ideals in a person and character as young children. However, it becomes overwhelmingly prevalent as maturity continues and individuals raised by opposing ideology clash it because obvious parents have a profound influence. Nearly all parents want their children to be successful, live a joyful life, and carry on a positive legacy. Therefor they request things such as a wife or girlfriend who has good character to positively influence them for many years to come.

Viewing life through the adult lens of learning optimum ideals they have collected throughout life they see a distant future that youth are unaware of. “A study of thirty newly married couples found six different themes for commitment. Words of affirmation, planning for the future, friendship, gradual process, positive examples, and negative examples” (Sibley, D. S., Springer, P. R., Vennum, A., & Hollist, C. S, 2015, p. 183). Words of affirmation and planning for the future were two common themes that exactly correlate with the morals parents are searching for.

In addition, authority figures tend to compliment formal and cordial attire, but disapprove of facial piercings, tattoos, pants sagging, and revealing clothing, because they have learned that kind of behavior can be interpreted as rash decision making, short sightedness, or even nonintellectual whether it is accurate or not. How individuals dress can say a lot about them and their upbringing. What is valued, how they were taught to picture themselves, even financial aptitude, can all be demonstrated through the artifacts they possess. Adults who chronically dress themselves with skimpy and inappropriate clothing cast a negative web of morals, not just to the world but over their family identity as well.

In a large cross-sectional survey and two three-month diary studies Cohen et al. (2014) discovered that “individuals that have high levels of morality have increased levels of Conscientiousness, self-control, consideration of future consequences” (Cohen, T. R., Panter, A. T., Turan, N., Morse, L., & Kim, Y, 2014, p. 943). People don’t particularly appreciate someone telling them what to do, what is right or wrong but their family knows them best and family is thinking about what is favorable in long term goals for their members. Accepting a parent’s words of wisdom gives insight into achieving the optimal self. How often do people wish that they could go back in time and tell their younger selves the secrets of success and knowledge they have currently? The answer is humanity will continue hoping for that fictional scenario until death. On the contrary, having kids give this opportunity because biological children carry a piece of who we are.

If one chews on the concept that education is theoretically as simple as prior generations passing down information they can experience a tasteful explosion of insight. Textbooks and teachers are solely gathered knowledge garnered from prior human experiences that compact over time into the creation of advancements like modern technology, medicine, and science. Breaking down these concepts to their bare bone minimum eliminates much of the curiosity in why American society places such a high priority on school systems but raises the ambiguity of what we should expect from the domesticated development in our children.

A guardian taught us to hold a spoon and dress ourselves comfortably out of lovingness. But all the sudden, when it comes to taking their request and rules seriously, children tend to feel oppressed by their authority. Usually kids wish to be treated as adults, but what does adulthood entail exactly? I personally believe it is how individuals articulate and control their emotions. Whereas, typically children fill with animosity, get defiant, emotional, rude, and loud, when elders tell them they cannot do something he or she desires. When youngsters rebel, they tend to ignore the long-term ramifications that family care about in a decision. If both sides of an argument utilized effective listening and explanatory techniques a controversy can readily come to a place of agreement due to an increase in understanding. Respectfully challenging an adult on why they believe something leads to better development and maturity in communication. Dysfunctional households where there is a lack of patients miss a fundamental connection in understanding the intent of the rules. A great way to fix this dilemma is through character.

When parents disagree with their kids actions it is important to break down the error in character instead of implying a vague statement. Guardians need to actively facilitate thoughtful communication in order to have productive dialog. For example, a parent denouncing their child’s attire by stating “You look like a delinquent.” this kind of language is representative of authoritarian parenting that will inevitably create divisiveness because youth do not understand the vastness of the authority’s intention. A more effective approach utilizes character by implementing patience to examine the indirect consequences of obduracy. “I understand the feeling of not wanting to care what society thinks about you. However, not caring about people and their feelings is a bad character trait that can negatively affect you throughout life.” This complex package of meaning divulges life experience but is wrapped with the implication that morals will help them achieve happiness topped with a bow of understanding.

One thing that does lie outside of the political environment is the responsibility of diversifying moral character lessons to the youth. Public high schools do not require an ethics course to graduate even for an advanced diploma. Likewise, students who disrespect their professors receive discipline or become quarantined, not informed for inappropriate behavior. Juxtaposition that with the overwhelming majority of corporate entities that favor character uprightness. Luxottica and the YMCA have mandatory training programs for virtues about respect, patience, and kindness.

According to Unequal childhoods by Lareau (2011) “poor families, black and white, used clear directives, but then turned over responsibility to schooling. She argued that these cultural logics of child rearing have merit, but the middle-class strategy of control had payoff in institutions” (Lareau, 2011, p. 1). Because schools don’t accommodate all morals like financial responsibilities children will rely on learning the importance of budgeting in the home. We cannot expect educational institutions to supply moral character. Those logistics are obscured within educational institutions because their primary directive is to advance the work capabilities of individuals.

Families that do not provide depth on how to deal with problems, generate hardworking employees that do not benefit as much as their informed counterparts. In the American economic system financial success requires ones to balance working hard equally with working smart. Accordingly, mitigating how children compare themselves to others is directly linked with moral upbringing. Adolescents who live with authority figures who spend competently tend to emulate their parent figure’s behavior. When children receive money, they splurge on ephemeral happiness and this can follow them into adulthood. Since these issues are not touched anywhere outside of the household it demands that guardians efficiently communicate the importance of saving money for a rainy day not just verbally but through practice.

Having powerful character is admirable in the workplace. Being trustworthy invites people to confide in them opposed to character flaws like stealing, being arrogant, boastful, or jealousy. Those traits will infect trust and distance coworkers. “According to metadata analysis being able to cultivate workplace friendships positively impact employees with absenteeism, task performance, turnover intention, job satisfaction, and group communication” (Lee, J. J., & Ph.D., C. O, 2011, p. 2). A capitalistic institution is made up with relationships that require respectful debate through effective communication especially for leadership. Professional relationship dynamics will deteriorate if weak character is left unchallenged within the household. Families that do not teach morals outside the school could be preparing their own glass ceiling for their children.

To recap, passive listening to parents causes poor life decisions to germinate. Chastising an adolescent’s behavior without questioning their character behind them lay the foundation of weak family dynamics. Challenging kids conjunctively improve understanding of intent. Parental figures who do not take the time to premeditate and explain their complexities of intent display a lack in their communication skill level. This is why families that lack adequate communication in values are a breeding ground for failure in communities, school, work, and marriages.

In conclusion adolescents need the challenges of their parents every bit as much as they need education to succeed and advance competitively. Salubrious families lift each other up when every member exercises active, listening, understanding, patience, and kindness in communication. Dynamic higher reasoning creates a meaningful dialog and in turn establishes agreeableness and teamwork inside families. Outstanding parenting techniques include communicating various moral development. Finally, family communication has to be morally contextualized to help negate current dysfunction in society, increase children better suited to land high paying careers, and life’s that have an abundance of satisfaction. This is why communicating diverse moral integrity in homes contribute to better family life, nurtures children better suited to have success within institutions, work, and increased future satisfaction.

Work Cited:

Lee, J. J., & Ph.D., C. O. (2011). Effects of Workplace Friendship on Employee Job Satisfaction, Organizational Citizenship Behavior, Turnover Intention, Absenteeism, and Task Performance.

Lareau, A. (2011). Unequal childhoods: Class, race, and family life. Univ of California Press.

Sibley, D. S., Springer, P. R., Vennum, A., & Hollist, C. S. (2015). An Exploration of the Construction of Commitment Leading to Marriage. Marriage and Family Review, 51(2), 183–203.

Cohen, T. R., Panter, A. T., Turan, N., Morse, L., & Kim, Y. (2014). Moral Character in the Workplace. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 107(5), 943–963.

Reflection Post: Why Have an e-Portfolio?

Having an ePortfolio, especially one done through a self-designed website can provide exceptional insight of modern skills to employers and upper management. Even though there are platforms such as LinkedIn, they lack the ability to personalize their appearance and information. A good ePortfolio can also demonstrate understanding of the web2.0 (Web design in the 21st century). As a Communications Major, we are expected to be the best communicators in the workplace regardless of the medium and much of which is through the internet today. In case of crisis management, it could make the difference whether or not one may be elected to curate a statement.

In the workplace Comm Majors should stand out as being well written and possessing the ability to communicate feeling and information professionally. This is true for any opportunity provided whether that be a new training packet and expectations or an email message. Opportunity comes to those who create it. Therefor, when asking for the opportunity to create inquiries for new business, HR, or PR needs, the ones who display competence will be considered.

My website could be improved by adding examples of visual work or awards. For example, I am unable to upload pictures/scans of awards, certifications, written statements, or photoshop examples, to LinkedIn. Consequently, I am wondering whether we will have the opportunity to incorporate this into our website/ePortfolio.

#typography #lessons #expert